why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
