Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize