You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
