The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize