I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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