Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
It was like getting head from an anaconda
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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