you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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