he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
