got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
