We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
