There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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