Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
