did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Randomize
