It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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