Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
