I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
MIDGETS
????
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
