Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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