I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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