so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
