I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
