are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Randomize