I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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