he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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