I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Randomize
