Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
So much Jack, so little girl.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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