Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
