Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize