Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
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