Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
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