So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Randomize