if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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