Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
