just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
