He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
