No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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