It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
