just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
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