i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Randomize
