We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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