I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
