none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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