Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
she woke up with a sticky ear
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Randomize