do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
