we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize