I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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