your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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