What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
Randomize
