i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
