On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Randomize
