She announced her abortion via fbk
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
