you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
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