like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
